Christian Family Services Ministry

A Word to the Wise – 5-7-2020 – On Sex

Part of the porn problems in marriage maybe traced back to false beliefs held by individuals who are married. Part should be blamed on the continual emphasis in our society that a woman’s body is hers to do as she wishes and by extension the man feels his body is his body to do as he wishes. With that in mind try driving on any road and seeing constant images of women in different stages of undress.
On one extreme a man will take Gen. 3:16 and twist it to mean the woman is enslaved to man (typical belief practiced in Islam). On the other extreme comes Paul in I Cor. 7:1 with ‘it is well for a man not to touch a woman’.
Sorry folks this is not the way God created it. Not only is neither extreme acceptable it leads to the false belief that we our possessors of our own bodies. We are not. One does not have the right to ‘demand ‘sex nor withhold sex because permission is not required nor forced. Nor should the marriage bed be defiled by images of extra marital sex. What is the result?
I have had clients tell me that a man cannot touch his wife without her expressed permission. If he does then he should be charged with criminal sexual assault.
Guess what the man has a serious problem with porn. Why? Because taking care of one’s own needs makes more sense than depending on the implied legal threats. Not only will this lead to marital dysfunction it may well lead to the man being unable to function sexually.
These fixed false beliefs lead to the rampart use of porn by both sexes, abortion, fornication, adultery, and all forms of immorality.
The reality is I Cor. 6:12 tells us that our bodies are the Lord’s not ours.
The problem we face as a society is being hammered by so many conflicting traditions that we get confused. This is what happens when one strays from scripture and its guidance.
When we try to eradicate porn we fail. Why? Because our focus fails to take into account the role of the woman from a godly perspective. The male and female are made for each other and both belong to the Lord.