Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Archive for March, 2017

3-4-3017 – A Word to the Wise: As a counselor, I have seen many newly married people unable to understand why they feel incompatible. After all, they say they lived together two years before they got married, just to see if they would be compatible. It seems marriage wipes out the prior adjustment. The nature of the marriage relationship begins with a covenant, which brings certain pledges, privileges, and responsibilities. These pledges provide the foundation for intimacy. One finds intimacy difficult in an atmosphere of insecurity. Satan knows he cannot duplicate the sense of pleasure and contentment that is possible in marriage. Thus he masks the purpose of sex by focusing on the outward appearance of woman and the ability to entangle the man in a web of lies. These lies lead to sexual addiction, for the imitation lacks the satisfaction of the real thing. The real thing brings fulfilling companionship. Because Satan’s substitute does not work, it is sought repeatedly in hopes of attaining that which it promises, but fails to deliver. Understanding this principle leads to the discovery that no immoral person possesses true knowledge of the Lord’s precious gift. God does not give knowledge of good to evil people. Satan perverts good and delivers as a substitute an immoral act incapable of providing a real sense of companionship. Instead, it provides just the opposite—a deep sense of emptiness and loneliness, making one hunger and yearn even more intensely.

Read Full Post »

3-3-2017 – A Word to the Wise: What if problems develop? Perhaps a mismatch occurs. Maybe a fit does not happen. The situation can be corrected, even late in marriage, as long as no one else has been brought into the relationship. But I assure you that if two people spend that first year putting their mate first— sacrificing, discovering, and providing, there will not be another person who can seriously challenge that marriage. Who would you suppose is the best person to instruct in sexual matters if not the newly married couple?? Some men and a few women would suggest a prostitute might be a good candidate, someone well experienced in the sexual appetite and how it is to be satisfied. There was a program filmed a few months ago where a mother concerned about her son’s future, took him to a house of prostitution when he was fifteen to learn about sex. Is this the best solution? Or perhaps someone trained like the courtesans of Oriental background. They possess superior knowledge, or do they? I would submit that the most naive virgin possesses more pure knowledge of such things than any of these. As startling as it may seem, those who misuse and abuse sex have no real knowledge of it. Since sex was by the Lord and not by Satan, true understanding must flow from the source. Certain things are known about God and may be trusted. One of the most trustworthy is that God does not reveal his truths to the evil one, nor in the hands of the evil one will one discover the paths of life. One must seek knowledge of sex from its Creator, not its perverter. God is the source of all knowledge. I do not think for a moment that He would trust such knowledge to such wickedness. The Lord God gives important knowledge to the person in marriage who needs and desires such wisdom.

Read Full Post »

3-2-2017 – A Word to the Wise: Moreover, during the first year of marriage, a fit is made. A multiple of factors are involved—size, shape, depth, smell, and our brain cells commit to memory every little detail. Our spirits bond to that person in a manner that can never be duplicated. Sure, you can find the cheap variety pack that fits everyone, but it is just not the same. With what can we compare the fitting process that takes place in the marriage relationship? Perhaps to the embryo that grows in the mother’s womb for nine months—the immune system accepts the fetus and it grows to fit the mother. Or the fitting process might also be compared to buying a pair of shoes. As they are worn, they are broken in to fit that particular foot. A physical fitting occurs sexually in much this same way. Sure two people can have sex with many other people; they do it all the time, but it is not the same. Have you ever noticed the shape of women’s stockings when they come out of those little eggs? What happens when she puts them on? They now fit her. What if someone else puts her hose on? They do not fit properly. Sure, a woman can have sex with more than one man, but the fit is now generic, not unique. So, what occurs when there are a number of partners? A very poor fit. You can use pliers to loosen a bolt or the proper size wrench made to fit it. The pliers do the job, but the risk of damage is much greater. One can put a 100-watt bulb in a 40-watt socket, but the risk of fire is much greater. One may put a 100-watt bulb in a 300- watt socket, but the output is much dimmer. Notice in I Samuel, David met several wise women of reputation before marriage. These women were smart, intelligent, and wise until they married David; then they disappear from the pages of history. One among many means the woman has far less influence in the life of the husband. There is limited ability for fitting when prior relationships have occurred.

Read Full Post »

3-1-2017 – A Word to the Wise: Moreover, I would submit that what occurs during that first year of marriage with two people who are cooperating with God’s laws is indeed a one-of-a kind-experience, which cannot be repeated. The fitting process only happens once in our lifetime, and the fit can only be for those two people. Let us look at what is supposed to happen sexually during the first year of marriage, and how it is affected by multiple sex partners. Perhaps this will give us further insight into the uniqueness of one’s mate. The importance of the first year for the marriage is emphasized by God when He mandates that during the first year, the man is exempt from everything —to allow him to tend to the marital relationship. What does the couple discover during that first year? First, although the idea is appealing, the chief purpose of sex is not to have children. Sex meets man’s need for companionship, and is a reminder of those days in the garden when man communed with the Lord about the deeper things of life. One needs only to recall the intense satisfaction of discovery of spiritual truths to acknowledge the truth of this.

Read Full Post »

« Newer Posts