7-8-2024 – A Word to the Wise – Regrets
Have you ever regretted doing a good deed? Did you find yourself mourning the deed to the point it brought tears to your eyes? I did. Let me give you the back story. A long time ago a woman approached me for counseling. Not so much for herself rather her son.
I had worked at Terrell State Hospital for nearly 15 years counseling alcohol and drug abusers. Now these were hard core addicts. Sure, they said they wanted help but not really. Seems most of the time it was because some family member had dump them their of sick of their lying, stealing and extreme behavior.
Any time a counselor is tasked with work it is imperative that they discover just how motivated the person is to change. Example there is one sure cure for alcohol it’s a drug that has been around 40 or more years one cannot drink and take this drug. If they do, they will get violently ill. Sometimes even hair spray will cause a violent reaction.
So, after 45 days or more of treatment a person is getting ready for discharge swearing they will never use alcohol again. So, you offer them Antabuse to insure sobriety. Out of over 5000 patients I only had 2 individuals agree to take the drug. One of the two stayed sober for many years. I lost track of the other one. This person was committed to sobriety.
Back to my story now in private practice, a person had heard of my work at Terrell and made an appointment. Seems her son was heavily into drugs and alcohol. She asks if I could help her son. I told her that it was not very likely because the person had to be committed to change. She wanted me at least to talk to him.
I agreed, first with the two together then him alone. By the end of the conversation, I knew this person had no desire to change. None, he just wanted his mother to take care of him. A year goes by. I tell her time and time again that the son does not want to stop. She would not give up. She was a devout Christian, and no one was hopeless. She had not seen what I had seen.
So, about a year later after many sessions she calls late at night wanting help. He was threatening suicide. So, I went over to see what could be done or to call law enforcement to have him committed.
As soon as I walked in, he left the room and I talked to her for a few minutes. The mother went to ask him to come back. Got to his room and I heard a loud scream. Went rushing in and he was on the floor blood everywhere. He had cut his left wrist to the bone.
I grabbed it above the cut to stop the bleeding. He struggled with me. Suddenly he grabbed the butcher knife and swung at me barely missing my shoulder. Now I had both his arms in a lock and told her to call 911.
Finally, about 15 minutes later the fire department got there and took over. Lesson number one, suicidal individuals are always homicidal.
A year later he was arrested for killing his mother for her money. What an absolute waste. I regret that I saved his life. I do not know how the Lord sees it. What would you have done?
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