Christian Family Services Ministry

3-24-2026 – A Word to the Wise – PART6 –

CURES

The Lord has placed within people a powerful force which when used properly inhibits the sexual response over a short period of time, with two different people. What I am speaking of now is the normal person who is a Christian who is remorseful about their infidelity. How one can know it exists is by this simple test. If you are being unfaithful do you desire sex with your spouse after your infidelity? Have you wondered why you did not? Now reverse the situation. Did you desire sex with your paramour after sex with your spouse? Is there not a feeling of repulsion at the thought? Where did it come from? It may be identified as guilt however if examined closely one will discover that it originates as a physical feeling, not an emotional experience. Believe it or not, the marriage sexual relationship is very influential in the lives of a married couple. A man is typically repulsed by other women after sex with his wife. It is rare for a person to go and have sex with another person right after sex with one’s wife or husband. The Lord has built into our make up certain barriers, which are difficult to surmount. Wives open doors to other women when she talks to other women about her husband. One should never talk to the same sex person about his or her spouse and the sexual relationship.

Moreover, have you given thought to the type of disease that afflicts those who are unfaithful? I mean besides sexual transmitted disease? You see illicit sex results in illness. This illness begins with the breakdown of the autoimmune system caused by guilt, and anxiety. As physical breakdown starts to occur usually within the first three months of transgression symptoms such as susceptibility to minor illness, colds, flu, and other minor illnesses occur. Allergy problems either begin or intensify. Stomach and bowel problems, blood pressures and other physical difficulties begin. Later more severe illness may set in. Diabetes, cancer, and a whole host of genetically rooted illness start to reveal themselves. Our bodies are now vulnerable because of the breakdown of our system due to anxiety and guilt. Quite a price to pay for a little fling.

The severity of the experience of the faithful mate is often just as great as for the guilty party. This can be explained to some degree, by the fitness principle. For those who marry without premarital promiscuous sex, the experience of infidelity can be excruciatingly painful. This is because the fit to one mate was much closer. The breaking of this link brings intense pain. No one escapes from adultery unharmed.

For the person who has had an unfaithful spouse the element of trust is crucial. How can I trust this person or anyone else they ask? The truth, though painful, is that you cannot. In fact, the trait of trust is forever removed from this relationship. How then can I know or be secure in the relationship again? Is it worth reestablishing the relationship again? The answer is yes, most certainly, under specific conditions. The innocent party must never ever suggest, ask, or demand, the mate promise fidelity. Nor does one accept such a promise. To make such a request is paramount to asking them to gouge out their eyes and it is doomed to failure. Security can only come from one’s relationship with God. Moreover, he or she can be sure of one’s faithfulness by the manner or relationship he or she maintains with the Lord. If one fails the other will not be far behind.