Christian Family Services Ministry

3-15-2023 – PART 2

CAUSES

Sex gives one a unique knowledge of the other person. Sex is a function that bonds two together. Each time this occurs with a different person the capacity for a deep relationship becomes weaker. Neither male nor female can serve more than one mate. Even when God allowed it (Abraham, Jacob, etc) the consequences were extreme. Jacob took two wives in one week. I doubt he ever had another day of peace. Sarah forced upon her husband a sexual relationship with her handmaid. The children from that union continue to war even today.

One cannot be unfaithful in marriage or, have multiple marriages without paying a heavy price. This is one of the central problems that occur in blended families. They just do not mix. What allows a mixture in a marriage (like adoption) is the correct authority structure. In re-marriages, the authority structure is always confused. Ask any one who has been in a previous marriage to tell you about it, and the first words will usually indicate some of that confusion. For instance, how do they refer to the previous mate? People tend most often say their ‘ex.’ What exactly is an “ex-mate”? Do we refer to prior pregnancies in this manner? Am I ex-pregnant? Thus, even our language suggests the confusion surrounding prior marriages. Confusion leads to anxiety and insecurity, which are rampant killers of new marriages. Or is it more appropriate to say repeat marriage, or perhaps next marriage.

There are other reasons why multiple marriages are a bad idea. The man makes himself very vulnerable to the woman he has sex with. Her knowledge of him has the potential to destroy him. Ironically, by engaging in multiple relationships, the man hopes to weaken his fear, and dilute the strength of the woman’s power over him. I suspect much of the distrust between men and women may be traced back to a man’s subconscious awareness of his vulnerability to the woman. These warnings are spelled out in Proverbs chapters five, six and seven.

As startling as it may seem those who misuse, and abuse sex have no real knowledge of sex. Since sex was created by the Lord not Satan, true understanding must flow from the source. Certain things are known about God and may be trusted. God does not reveal his truths to the evil one, nor in the hands of the evil one will one discover the paths of life. One must seek knowledge of sex from its Creator, not its perverter. God is the source of all knowledge. I do not think for a moment that He would trust such knowledge to such wickedness. He would give it to the person who in marriage needs and desires such wisdom.